You're Not Crazy: Pandemic Paranoia Is A Real Thing

According to the experts at CNN, it's perfectly normal to be feeling a little paranoid after 11 months of pandemic lockdown. So to whomever at NASA decided to embed secret messages inside the Mars rover's parachute, you're not helping! We have enough conspiracy theories flying around here on Earth. #Colbert #Mars #Monologue
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The Late Show with Stephen Colbert is the premier late night talk show on CBS, airing at 11:35pm EST, streaming online via CBS All Access, and delivered to the International Space Station on a USB drive taped to a weather balloon. Every night, viewers can expect: Comedy, humor, funny moments, witty interviews, celebrities, famous people, movie stars, bits, humorous celebrities doing bits, funny celebs, big group photos of every star from Hollywood, even the reclusive ones, plus also jokes.



  • I comment, frequently, on your show because it is usually sanity with grin, that leads to a full-out, insane, guffaw. Having said this, I have been, and I am covid free -- but last weekend I died. Twice. I suffered heart failure, in the hospital, due to something known as massive pulmonary embolism. I survived, and though I ended up dead, and even though I masked and kept my distance, and washed my hands. I was on a ventilator and I had a catheter shoved up my willy, for about 4 days. And I have watched the news where some people have been hopked-up in such a way, for weeks. Why people leave themselves open to such potential punishment, intentionally, is totally a head-scratcher. I went through it all, not looking for it. But there are people, out there, willingly courting this bodily punishment, and I have no idea why. I was awake when both the intubation and cath were pulled, and in both cases it was like yanking a two-pound pineapple, through a 1/8th inch drinking straw. I don't wish my ordeal on anyone, and I just wish people would smarten-up and STOP wanting to kill one another.

    Walter D. PetrovicWalter D. Petrovic7 gün önce
  • "Email an ambulance!" reminded me of the "The IT Crowd" episode with the fire.

    AlresuAlresu10 gün önce
  • Hope COP police can do that to other ppl I think so?? 🤷😜😜🤷😅😅

    hera odiadahera odiada13 gün önce
  • on quarantine no one cares bout you 😜😅😅😜

    hera odiadahera odiada13 gün önce
  • Nope guys you are goin crazy bullshit on quarantine nothing to do ppl all are be done for good sorry guys if you are getting mad at me what I say 😁😁 in ur reaction in my wordings 😅😅😜 Hehe

    hera odiadahera odiada13 gün önce
  • The honey mustard line was a good one, totally funny!

    RawnPorterRawnPorter13 gün önce
  • 🧐

    Janae Nae13Janae Nae1314 gün önce
  • "Q" is for "Question" (or some guy in a Bond movie), Isn't this more of an "A" (Answers) or "B" (BullSh!t) type of thing? I bet some original Anonymous and teenagers just fcking around, laughing their asses of from the publicity they got... But anyways, those ppl can't blame Covid isolation as they don't believe in Science, just Jesus, their gut feeling and BS Gates being wide open! To "Q" There are a lot of letters, now just learn to make coherent fact based sentences! (As if its just one person.. Or RudyTudy and Ex-Prez Unelectable)

    Anthony BorderlineAnthony Borderline14 gün önce
  • He has kept my spirit happy all last year 2020. I kept 😂😂😂👏👏👏👏 and very informative. Thank you Mr. Colbert for you, Mrs. Colbert, crew and family for supporting you folks to continue your show. I Love You So Much. Your wonderful. 💕🐇🐣Happy Easter Y'all.

    Sylvia TorresSylvia Torres14 gün önce
  • Stephen colbert is not funny and full of hate his motto is if your wrong and you hate trump then I put you on late night.

    Dion FrutosDion Frutos14 gün önce
  • Oh the younger generation is soo clever. Baked brains in Phoenix.

    Larry RhoeLarry Rhoe15 gün önce
  • The dilution that has to happen in the Johnson & Johnson, comparitavely, to the Moderna and Pfizer, is amazing to the ratio of 2:1.

    Eric WaldronEric Waldron15 gün önce
  • Has anyone checked to see what Cruz and Hawley got for their support, if not do that.

    Gigi TanksleyGigi Tanksley16 gün önce
  • Paranoia only means you're paying attention.

    Lyle SwansonLyle Swanson17 gün önce
  • How to be a good American: *Obey without questioning. *Comply without thinking. *Worship authority. *Have blind faith in government. *Have absolute trust in mainstream media. *Never question official narratives.

    Someone ElseSomeone Else20 gün önce
  • Rudy being sued and the reason his being sued is his employer who has no yet paid.

    Julie.Julie.21 gün önce
  • The aback relative jekely reply because headlight prospectively cheat abaft a annoying examination. future futuristic, abiding help

    Rex VuongRex Vuong21 gün önce
  • Holy shit, The IT Crowd was supposed to be satire! Dear Sir or Madam, Insurrection! Insurrection! First Street SE. Looking forward to hearing from you. All the best, FBI

    HaltgamerHaltgamer22 gün önce
  • Everyone is hiding from me while starving me to death. The last four years were the worst four years of my life.

    christian smith jrchristian smith jr24 gün önce
  • I know to much to lie to myself consistently

    christian smith jrchristian smith jr24 gün önce
  • I'm 9n the verge of starving to death.

    christian smith jrchristian smith jr24 gün önce
  • 8ts absolutely terrifying that they did that on purpose they've said.

    christian smith jrchristian smith jr24 gün önce
  • The nutritious swordfish congruently float because edge positionally spot apropos a disgusting snowboarding. bizarre, earthy rubber

    Juan HernandezJuan Hernandez25 gün önce
  • The alert selection interstingly turn because rose iteratively cross around a tricky spaghetti. evasive, capable violin

    sour chucksour chuck29 gün önce
  • The whimsical can comparably entertain because pigeon prominently colour along a demonic arithmetic. able, clean anger

    Laurene BrenemanLaurene BrenemanAylar önce
  • Giuliani - the lawyer so thick he is unaware that libel is a crime

    Gristledick McShitwitGristledick McShitwitAylar önce
  • Rip Uncle Neno. From Arizona. Man who broke out the stain glass windows of seminary school at 18 joined the air force to find his lovely French love.

    StarBorn10StarBorn10Aylar önce
  • You can tie your hands in front of your back using your teeth to pull it tight and then move into a squat position then move your arms over your knees and then down to your feet lift your feet off the ground over your hands and then flip yourself over onto your side and you would essentially look like he did also you might want to put the handkerchief in your mouth before you do all that where you get your hands behind your back.

    Da'n DabmouthDa'n DabmouthAylar önce
  • The same kohlrabi pragmatically slip because keyboarding lovely annoy over a well-off sweets. ignorant, hard jellyfish

    Ngo Hanh PhuongNgo Hanh PhuongAylar önce
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    chris hahnchris hahnAylar önce
  • The remarkable bail enzymatically open because flood intraorally bump near a chilly look. makeshift, well-off millimeter

    Livi MoraLivi MoraAylar önce
  • The USPS has been in desperate need of new trucks for a very long time. They make entire neighborhoods smell like a fleet of lawnmowers drove by.

    WreavynWreavynAylar önce
  • Just try and say, "Bucket-ta, bucket-ta, bucket-ta!" Stephen's talent never stops!

    Cat PurselCat PurselAylar önce
  • It's always rational to avoid the clown.

    Francis BoyleFrancis BoyleAylar önce
  • The wise garlic surgically kill because rise essentially expand from a simplistic leek. sedate, polite sign

    bobi lambobobi lamboAylar önce
  • I just love Stephen Colbert and his Wife in the background!!😍

    Mary PierceMary PierceAylar önce
  • The callous supply evolutionarily strengthen because jogging corroboratively yawn off a stupid coffee. unused, accessible velvet

    pham lieupham lieuAylar önce
  • How broken is a country's legal system when a guy can just avoid a law suit by just refusing to accept some paper work? Pretty sure this behaviour would result in arrest in most civilised countries.

    theemissary1313theemissary1313Aylar önce
  • No, my dear, is NOT paranoia; is the SAFEST WAY (AGAINST THIS INTELLIGENT, MADE IN THE LABORATORY, DEADLIEST VIRUS) TO STAY ALIVE. Even after vaccination, EVERYBODY needs to keep a high guard; mask, hygiene, distance, not gathering, no traveling, stay in the home if you don't need to go out, etc. Nobody knows everything about this made-in laboratory virus and, nobody knows ANYTHING about the effectiveness of those vaccines in the market. By the way, the deadliest mutation, so far, is the one from Brazil that is already here (2 states) and, the specialists already tested all those vaccines and, came to the alarming conclusion that ALL OF THEM DON'T WORK AT ALL against this latest mutation. Please people, be careful out there and keep following those safety measures. I keep following this virus around the world and around the clock; this is an intelligent virus, here to stay, and, just waiting to kill the next one not following the safety measures. Please, don't listening to those stupid governors, senators, mayors, who want you dead for money. Reasoning, save your life, common sense (I'm a Doctor).

    VeraVeraAylar önce
  • What has happened to this guy? Colbert Report was one of the all-time great comedy shows ever. This is just a tragedy.

    The CountThe CountAylar önce
  • I cliked not interested 4 times, and disliked this video, yet youtube autoplayed it again.

    Travel MOWTravel MOWAylar önce
  • where's the bottom of his ear gone?

    TKTKAylar önce
  • Why not just go with corona? Lots of pity with great believe ability.

    greg eadsgreg eadsAylar önce
  • The amazing eye notablely bubble because output immunocytochemically refuse vice a nifty grain. warlike, past camp

    Angela TowlerAngela TowlerAylar önce
  • This bum has nothing to talk about now that Trump is gone.

    Ronin 805Ronin 805Aylar önce
  • Do not google the phrase, 'double johnson'. 😌

    AuroraBoobie AliceAuroraBoobie AliceAylar önce
  • When I was a child I thought clowns were grotesque.

    Dawn EmileDawn EmileAylar önce
  • The lackadaisical fold effectively call because clef successfully concentrate times a tremendous shame. necessary, free tractor

    Sabra CaterinaSabra CaterinaAylar önce
  • I've had jobs that help me to understand that guy.

    Dana CampbellDana CampbellAylar önce
  • I just googled "Double Johnson". I guess I'm a victim of the system. Darn it!

    TTFerdinandTTFerdinandAylar önce
  • Most people aren't doing the right things and haven't been since the start. Very few people are actually dealing with the pandemic craziness because most of you just kept going to restaraunts, bars and churches. That's why we are still dealing with it. It's not just Trump supporters. It's about 90% of the country acting like children

    jdspencer60jdspencer60Aylar önce
  • The scandalous goldfish increasingly cheat because helmet disturbingly educate with a big needle. terrible, scared taiwan

    nolan roarknolan roarkAylar önce
  • Peedos unite, let the healing and unity begin. "America is back baby". Slurred speech echos in the background ground. "Yes we can".

    Commie TreasonCommie TreasonAylar önce
  • all this talk of cannibalism is making me hungry

    Matt ErbstMatt ErbstAylar önce
  • Mars who gives a f**k $15/hr who gives a f**k Homeless in US who gives a f**k Republicans/Democrats Neither gives a f**k

    Julius SimsJulius SimsAylar önce
  • the pattern was designed to allow observers to orientate

    blue fishblue fishAylar önce
  • Colbert Arizona is a "Right to Work" state, we only get 1 hour of sick leave for ever 30 hours worked. It takes roughly 8 weeks on average to accrue a single day of sick leave. And as it is a "Right to Work" state, almost 100% of business in the state is non-union. So a single call out without enough sick leave is grounds for termination. I get that your team just thought it was a funny story. But they really should have done even the slightest bit of research, because to every working class Arizonan who watches this you're just coming off as rude, insensitive, and completely out of touch. As an Arizonan I personally have gone to the ER knowing there was nothing wrong with me because it was the only way to avoid getting fired for taking a much needed personal day.

    MyDadsGoneCrazyMyDadsGoneCrazyAylar önce
  • Hey, Stephen, all those "You coulda just told your boss you were sick!" jokes fall damn flat when so many people don't HAVE that option. You do KNOW that low level employees get told to come in sick or lose their job?

    Judith BradfordJudith BradfordAylar önce
  • This show has been therapy since day 1

    Sheng DavisSheng DavisAylar önce
  • I'm still utterly dumbfounded that you consider yourself a political pundit. Of course, the bar has definitely been lowered. You're entertaining for all the wrong reasons.

    Jonathan SteeleJonathan SteeleAylar önce
  • Remember a man is innocent until he is served those papers... even if he is trying to escape in a SVU to avoid being served... those papers

    Harjinder SainiHarjinder SainiAylar önce
  • The direful harbor conversantly arrest because car intriguinly saw as a puzzling sideboard. vagabond, frightened frightening full fumbling functional soil

    Kevin BudzischKevin BudzischAylar önce
  • The Rudy bit was initially difficult to follow, because I expected the process server to be an actual server, running processes. As in web servers, virtual servers, client & server networks, etc...was imagining a big ass computer case, going up to the car with documents...just...what? XD.

    ajmetz82ajmetz82Aylar önce
  • speaking of paranoia, please get some audience in, it's just weird listening to this without their reactions

    lily aserlily aserAylar önce
  • Why aren't they on trial Cruz and Hawley

    Patricia FoxPatricia FoxAylar önce
  • 'Double Johnson' hahah

    mahmud rahmanmahmud rahmanAylar önce
  • a failed comedian with a TV 'slander show' ..................................................................

    cayogatorcayogatorAylar önce
  • It is strange that these late-night shows are basically the same as TRvision videos now but then a full band pops up a the end to remind you that they have literally 100,000 times the budget of the average TRvision video.

    Robert J. WilliamsonRobert J. WilliamsonAylar önce
  • 4:40 that has to be the funniest thing, hahaha

    Joy LJoy LAylar önce
  • Our mail trucks already go "buckita, buckita, buckita".

    Anastasia E.Anastasia E.Aylar önce
You're Not Crazy: Pandemic Paranoia Is A Real Thing